The Marriage & Motherhood Podcast: How To Tell If It's Time To Work With A Marriage Professional
In this episode, I dive into a topic that many of us navigate but sometimes hesitate to discuss openly: maintaining a fulfilling marriage after having kids. Life gets hectic, and while we do our best to keep the spark alive, sometimes calling in reinforcements can make all the difference. Let’s explore when it might be time to reach out for professional help and how to go about it.
Why Marriage Gets Tough After Kids
Isn't it something how life changes dramatically after kids? The dynamic between you and your partner shifts, and suddenly, those spare moments to enjoy each other feel far away. Responsibilities pile up, and our time is devoured by logistics rather than love notes. If you find yourself nodding along, you're not alone. Many couples experience communication breakdowns, unmet expectations, and a dwindling connection. It's all too common for intimacy to take a back seat as exhaustion levels rise and financial stress surfaces.
Recognizing When It's Time for Help
Let’s get real—tackling some of these challenges alone can feel like an uphill battle. So, how do you know when it’s time to call in some professional back-up? Here are some tell-tale signs: recurring, unresolved arguments; feeling more like roommates than partners; escalating fights or avoiding tough talks; nurturing resentment; or experiencing ongoing parenting conflicts. These are just a few indicators, but trust your gut! If thoughts of separation or divorce have crossed your mind or if emotional and physical intimacy seems to be a fading memory, professional guidance might be what you need.
Exploring Professional Support
Let’s demystify those support options. Typically, there are two paths: marriage counseling and marriage coaching. Counseling is fantastic when past wounds or mental health issues need healing. It focuses on recovering emotional well-being to move forward. On the other hand, marriage coaching is future-focused, offering strategies and accountability to strengthen the relationship. It’s goal-oriented and perfect for when you’re ready to take action but don’t need to delve deep into past traumas.
Investing in Your Marriage
Think of it this way: We’re quick to get our kids the help they need at school or for their health, but why do we delay getting support for our own relationships? Your marriage is just as worthy of that investment. By seeking help, not only are you nurturing your bond, but you’re also setting a powerful example for your children on how to handle relationships with care and intentionality.
Take the Next Step
If you’ve tried all you can on your own and feel that professional help is the next logical step, don’t wait! Whether you lean towards a counselor or feel a coach is right for you, there’s no shame in asking for help. Most professionals offer free consultations, allowing you to get a feel for whom you best connect with. Growth requires vulnerability, but it’s worth it to find the right person to help guide your journey.
What has brought your marriage to its present state may not propel it to where you'd love it to be. It might be time for a fresh perspective and some new strategies. If you've resonated with anything here, take a moment to reflect and consider seeking help. Your marriage—just like every other aspect of your life—deserves tender care and good reinforcements when needed.
So, my friend, let’s make sure that marriage of yours thrives, not just survives. And remember, I'm here rooting for you every step of the way. Book a clarity call with me to start getting support!