The Marriage & Motherhood Podcast: Avoid Feeling Let Down This Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day can often stir up a mix of emotions—anticipation, excitement, and sometimes even disappointment. But what if you could ensure that this year is your best one yet? As a marriage coach, I've got some tips to help you navigate this day with ease and joy, whether or not you've had the best experiences in the past.

Why Valentine's Day Can Be Frustrating

Everywhere you turn—whether it's a giant retail store, Instagram ad, or school reminder—you're faced with Valentine's Day hype. It's so easy to get caught up in the stress of planning something perfect, especially if you're already juggling parenthood and a busy life. And let's be real; sometimes it's a lot to ask, right after the holiday period, when all we want is a little breather.

Understanding the Root of Disappointment

We often assume our partners should know what we want without having communicated it. It’s like expecting them to be mind readers, leading to inevitable disappointment when things don’t go as we hoped. It’s important to realize that healthy relationships thrive on clear communication, not on assumptions.

Steps to a Happy Valentine's Day

1. Know What You Want: Before anything else, get clear on how you want to celebrate. Do you want a cozy night in or something more extravagant? Knowing this helps you communicate more effectively with your partner.

2. Ask Your Partner's Thoughts: Have an open dialogue about what Valentine’s Day means to them. Maybe they don't care about it as much and that's okay. It offers a chance to share your desires honestly and plan something together, aligning both expectations.

3. Plan Together: Instead of hinting at what you might want, be direct and plan together. This enhances the connection and ensures that both parties are invested in making the day special. Divide the responsibilities, so there’s no confusion about who’s handling what.

4. Focus on Connection, Not Perfection: Valentine's Day isn’t about creating a movie-like fairy tale but about enjoying each other's presence. Aim for quality time and emotional connection, rather than orchestrating a flawless day.

Remember, your goal is connection, not picture-perfect scenarios. Communicate early, align expectations, and allocate responsibilities clearly. Above all, focus on celebrating the love you share in a way that feels meaningful to both of you. If you're feeling the Valentine's Day stress creeping in, talk to your partner now, not the day before, when everything gets booked up.

Think about your wedding day; it likely wasn't perfect. There were hiccups, right? But the joy came from the union, the promises you made to each other—Valentine's Day is similar. Keep your intention at the forefront, and you'll find the day more enjoyable, imperfections and all.

Cheers to love, communication, and intentionally creating moments that matter! If any of this resonated with you, I'd love to hear your thoughts and see what plans you’re setting in motion. Wishing you the best Valentine's Day yet—one filled with fun, love, and connection!