Navigating Anger in Marriage: Turning Arguments into Conversations

In this episode, we're diving into how recognizing and understanding emotional patterns can transform arguments into more productive conversations, ultimately fostering growth in our marriage.

Understanding Emotional Patterns

Let’s be honest, no one wakes up hoping to have an argument with their spouse. In fact, most of us hope for smooth sailing each day, desiring progress rather than setbacks in our relationships. Recognizing our emotional patterns is a pivotal step toward achieving that. Once we understand the habitual ways we react during conflicts, we can begin to navigate them more effectively. These patterns often form as protective responses, but they don’t always serve our best interests.

Teaching Our Children Emotional Management

Our emotions heavily influence our daily interactions, so it's crucial to handle them wisely. This is especially important as parents, as our children watch and learn fro...

In this episode, I am joined by Mitch Blackford, a coach specializing in helping moms navigate the complex transition of motherhood and marriage, to talk about how you can go from roommate to romance.

Understanding the Challenges of Motherhood

Motherhood undeniably transforms a woman's life, presenting unique challenges that often lead to feelings of disconnection and overwhelm. Mitch shared her personal journey, highlighting how transitioning from woman to mom can strain a marriage. This transition often leaves women feeling "touched out" and emotionally drained, leading many to place their intimate relationships on the back burner.

The Importance of Intimacy

One of the primary discussions revolved around the critical topic of intimacy — and how motherhood can often make it seem like a distant concept. Mitch emphasized the commonality of feeling emotionally and physically exhausted, which can cause women to shy away from intimate connections, even though it's a vital part of ...

Marriage and motherhood can be challenging, but achieving growth and improvement doesn't have to be complicated. Sometimes, simple, foundational steps can lead to remarkable changes. Here, we're going to discuss a transformative two-step process that can rejuvenate your marriage, streamline your life, and help you become the parent you aspire to be.

Step 1: Establish a Vision

One of the fundamental questions I ask anyone considering working with me is: "What is it that you are wanting?" Many people struggle to articulate their desires, often focusing on what they don't want rather than what they do want. But without a clear vision, it's nearly impossible to see progress.

Your vision is not about psychic abilities but a crystal-clear picture of the future you desire. It includes every facet of life—your marriage, your parenthood journey, your personal development, your relationships, and your career goals. Having this vision simplifies decision-making. Anytime you're faced with ...

Understanding Boundaries Versus Ultimatums: Strengthening Relationships Through Respect and Communication

Welcome back to another episode, in this episode I got to dive deep into the complexities of boundaries versus ultimatums in relationships with fellow marriage coach, Nevart Willborn. Together, we explored how these concepts can either strengthen or damage a marriage depending on the implementation.

What Are Boundaries and Ultimatums?

We first kicked off the discussion with the definitions and nuances of boundaries and ultimatums. A boundary is essentially a way to teach others how to treat us by expressing our needs and limits. A boundary is about helping others understand what we need and implementing a healthy response when those needs are not met.

On the other hand, an ultimatum often comes across as a final demand or a non-negotiable condition. Nevart highlights the key difference: "An ultimatum is rooted in control. It's a statement where rejection results in retalia...

Is Love Enough to Sustain a Marriage After Kids?

Welcome back to another episode of the Marriage and Motherhood Podcast! In this episode, we explore whether love is enough to keep a marriage strong after kids.

The Shift: From Partners to Parents

When love leads to marriage, it often stems from the deep affection couples have for each other. But once you become parents, life changes drastically. You now face new responsibilities, time constraints, and a significant shift in your relationship dynamics. The priorities shift from each other to the children, leading many to wonder, "Where does our relationship go from here?"

Unspoken Assumptions and Overlooked Needs

It's easy to fall into the trap of assuming love will conquer all challenges. However, once kids enter the picture, love often turns implied rather than demonstrated. The acts of love shift to task-based activities: feeding the kids, handling household chores, and managing schedules. While love fuels these actions, it ...

In this episode, I have an honest conversation with fellow marriage coach, Nevart Willborn, about boundaries.

Understanding Boundaries in Relationships

Boundaries are fundamental to maintaining a healthy relationship. They’re not about controlling the other person but about setting limits for yourself to protect your emotional and mental well-being.

For me, a boundary is something that helps you actually strengthen and be in a relationship with someone. Boundaries are not about telling someone else what they should do but about informing them what you will do if a certain line is crossed.

Common Misconceptions About Boundaries

A common misconception is that boundaries are a form of control over others. This misunderstanding can lead to a dynamic where one person tries to change the other’s behavior instead of focusing on their own actions. When you set a boundary, it's about what you're going to do, not about making someone else do something.

Examples of Boundaries

In both ...

Welcome back to another episode of The Marriage and Motherhood Podcast. This topic was inspired by a post I stumbled on in a Facebook group. A woman was asking if sleeping in separate rooms would hurt the marriage. 

Rest or Romance?

A woman in the group shared her problem: she and her husband have trouble sleeping together due to conflicting sleep habits. From taking up too much space to noisy disturbances. Although they have a fantastic relationship outside the bedroom, the poor sleep quality was leading to resentment.

Her main concern? Social norms. The idea of sleeping in separate rooms seemed drastic, and she wondered if it would drive them toward divorce.

Challenging Social Norms

If you’ve been following along with my content, you know that I’m an advocate for challenging social norms. Every marriage is unique, and what works for one couple might not work for another. The concept of following societal expectations blindly can often hinder personal happiness and marital ...

Welcome back to another episode of the Marriage and Motherhood podcast. In this episode, we're diving into how marriage evolves after you become parents. This topic is relevant to both new and seasoned parents, offering insights and practical advice to help you navigate the changes that parenthood brings to your relationship.

The Changing Dynamics of Partnership

Partnership Before Parenthood

Before you have kids, partnership primarily revolves around mutual decision-making, consultation on important matters, and offering each other support. These principles still hold post-parenthood but on a much different scale. Before kids, it's simpler: Do we make decisions together? Do you consult with me on big matters? Are you helpful to me? Do I feel like we're a team?

The Shift Post-Parenthood

After kids, the specificity of roles becomes more critical. Our expectations for our partners drastically increase. The granular details—like "Who's going to do what?" need clear definit...

7 Key Lessons Learned from Our Cross-Country Move and Major Life Changes

After a recent cross-country move from California to Atlanta and a myriad of changes, I'm excited to share the lessons my husband and I have learned.

Whether you're grappling with big decisions or navigating the complexities of family life, these insights could make all the difference. Let's dive in!

1. Keep Each Other in the Loop

Communicating effectively is fundamental. During our move, my husband and I realized that failing to stay updated on each other’s schedules and plans led to a lot of miscommunication. Establishing a routine check-in, whether nightly or weekly, ensures that both partners are aligned and reduces unnecessary friction. One great tool we've found helpful is the Skylight calendar, which integrates with Google Calendar and keeps us organized and on the same page.

2. Discuss Your Goals

Aligning on goals helps you work together rather than at cross-purposes. Take the time to discuss what each of y...

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